发布时间 : 星期二 文章新高考读后续写高分素材--微技能之细节描写 - 图文更新完毕开始阅读963a276e541810a6f524ccbff121dd36a32dc4e8
cellar was as quiet as it was dark, with only one sound to be heard; the sound of her own pulse throbbing in her ears. Suddenly, the serenity of silence surrendered to the deathly scream of hinges, as the door opposite her was slowly pried open. A narrow stream of light gracefully meandered through the room, and a shadow quickly followed. She was scared.
Cathy held her breathe, daring not to make a sound. Each second seemed to last an eternity as she lay perfectly still listening to the footsteps of the intruder, which had muted the pounding of her pulse. Key words：______________________ Your treasure:_____________________
恐惧来自自身，最大的恐惧其实就是恐惧本身！
读后续写微技能|如何让你笔下的对话更加准确传神
对话（dialogue）是故事角色在整个故事中对彼此或对自己说的话。它可以用来揭示人物的性格和个性，它也可以用来推动情节向前发展，并展示情节发展的过程。
对话是故事中最重要的元素之一。对话的语言要避免冗长的叙述，要避免直接告诉读者而要通过其他手段来展示它们。优秀的对话会让你故事中的人物生动立体，栩栩如生，将推动你的故事进展，使其更有乐趣，而拙劣的对话将破坏一个好的故事。
11. 如何准确使用对话中的标点 请观察下面的句子。
Jack asked, “Do you think it will rain today?”
“I have a new umbrella,” explained Emily, “and I am excited to try it out.” “Why don't you check the weather forecast on your phone?” suggested Carly. “It is as simple as the smile on your face,” he said. 先看一个如何使用标点的视频 英语对话标点使用规则：
第一、 对话提示词（Dialogue tags）“Jack asked,”/ “explained Emily,”/ “suggested Carly,” 的位置可以放在引用的对话前、中、后三个位置。 第二、 对话中的逗号，永远在引号里面。对话提示词“某某人说”构成了整个句子的框架，它和它引用的部分是一个整体，是完整的一个句子。这就
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解释了很多老师的疑惑，为啥对话有时候引用的对话说完了，但是后面却用逗号。 如：“It was as hard as a rock,” he said. 但是： He said，“It was as hard as a rock.” 第三、 整个对话（引用部分+对话提示词）完整的时候，才能使用句号。对话开始首字母大写。如果对话提示词是插在一个完整对话中间的， 后面需要用逗号。且后半句话开头首字母要小写。 如：“I have a new umbrella,” explained Emily, “and I am excited to try it out.” Exercise 1：给下面的句子加标点 1. There's a fifty percent chance of rain this afternoon, reported Emily. 2. Emily asked, Do you think I should take my new umbrella to school? 3. Of course you should take it to school, answered Jack. 4. If it starts raining, Carly added, you will be nice and dry. 5. Emily squealed(尖叫), I see dark gray storm clouds rolling in. 6. Oh no! exclaimed (惊叫)Jack. Carly and I don't have umbrellas. 7. Hooray! yelled（喊叫） Emily. It's finally raining. 8. Carly mumbled（咕哝地说）, My hair is getting soaked. 9. Would you and Jack like to share my umbrella with me? asked Emily. 10. Thank you Emily, said Carly. You're more than just a fair weather friend. 2 如何让你的对话不平庸 对话的关注点就是故事中的角色 1）对谁说了什么话 2）说话的同时在做什么 3）如何说的 例1 A: \me the money,\Katherine said. B: \me the money,\Katherine said, eyes staring at the money on the table。 在高考读后续写的实际操作中，我们更加钟爱B 这种句式，既表明了说话对象，又描述了说话的方式，让读者更有画面感。 例2 \me that toy gun ,\Tom said angrily. Lucy grinned, hiding it behind her back. 这组对话中的said angrily 的使用让整个对话表现平庸。改变这种现状的办法有两种 14
I. 换直接告诉的词（said angrily）为展示型词汇（如： shouted/ screamed/ barked） 请看下面视频 II．在上下文语境明确的情况下，通过动作和神态描写来代替枯燥乏味的sb. said …(对话提示语)。 这样处理的好处是：1）增加表现力生动性 2）避免打断对话的语流。 如： Tom slammed the doll on the ground and glared at Lucy，\me the toy.\ Lucy grinned，hiding it behind her back.. 提示：在读后续写的创作中，尽量少用副词来表述说话人讲话方式（因为你用了副词那就是tell而不是show）,特别是你要主要渲染的场景.让你的对话有趣逼真有画面立体感的是你如何使用show的技能，那就一定要使用一些描绘性的动词。（他们说了什么话，说话时同时在做什么，以及是如何说的） 拙劣表达： \going to the store,\ Sydney announced happily. \go with me?\ 上面这个例子中Sydney的感情是直接告知的，干巴巴的，了无生趣。 优秀表达： Sydney pulled his shiny, new driver's license out of his pocket. The car keys were already in his hand as he flashed them at his little sister and grinned. \going to the store,\he announced. \ go with me?\ 第二个例子中，虽然没有用happily一词，但是Sydney的高兴的表情是通过动作描写溢于纸面。这样的表达就能博得高考阅卷老师的眼球，从而获得高分。 下面的两个例子都是我们需要追求的： “I just don’t know anymore,” Mary folded her arms. “I think I’m afraid of you.” Harry sighed. “I’m sorry,” He shook his head. “I’m not very good at this.” 练习2：试比较体会下面三句话的优劣 1. But I don't want to go to sleep yet,\2. But I don't want to go to sleep yet,\whined. 3. He stood in the doorway with his hands balled into little fists at his sides. His red, tear-rimmed eyes glared up at his mother. \I don't want to go to sleep yet.\ Exercise 3：(请改写下面的句子使它表达更生动传神) “I don’t want to see you again,” Lily said tonelessly. “You don’t mean that,” Jack said desperately. 15
“You’re an idiot,” Lily said angrily.
对话并不难写。只要记住在任何时候都要生动逼真。在准确的对话格式的前提下，确保你写的所有内容都是展示出来的，不是简单直接地告诉读者在那个场景中发生了什么或者说了什么。省略副词或者不要过度使用副词。这些简单的规则可以帮助你写出出色的对话。
Possible answers for Exercise 3
Lily turned away and crossed her arms. “I don’t want to see you again.” “You don’t mean that.” Jack pushed to his feet in a rush. She glared at him. “You’re an idiot.”
读后续写微技能|氛围营造法之一: 8大场景描写技能
好的读后续写必然要有好的故事氛围。而好的故事氛围要受到多个故事元素的影响: 场景、用词选择、对话、独白、语言节奏和修辞法等等。文学中的（mood）是一种写作的氛围或普遍基调，它是读者在阅读文本时候的一种情绪体验，也是作者想要给读者营造的一种故事氛围。故事场景是情绪体验的核心因素。故事的背景和每一个场景的视觉, 嗅觉和听觉等其他感官能够营造出一种特定的气氛。今天小编就想从场景描写这个角度来谈谈如何营造（mood）。What to write? (写什么？)
Where did it take place? When did it happen? What’s the weather like? What are the social conditions? What is the landscape like? What special details to add?
How to write well? （怎么写？）Technique 1: Personification (拟人) Description/purpose:
Gives an object the characteristics of a living thing, bringing it to life Examples：
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